It shouldn’t feel like we need a strategy just to go for drinks with the girls. We shouldn’t have to text our location, or pretend to be on a call when walking home. But disgustingly, this is where we’re at, where staying safe means thinking three moves ahead.
After the incident involving Chloe Koyce, a chilling reminder of how vulnerable women still are even in supposedly “safe” spaces, people collectively expressed outrage over the situation and shared their personal experiences – as well as safety tips and tools.
What emerged was a united understanding that while we wait (and demand) for real systemic change, we’re going to use every digital tool we can to look out for each other.
For Peace of Mind, Always
It starts small. A message to a friend: “Let me know when you’re home.” A shared location and time estimate. A gut instinct.
Today, those little habits have evolved into digital tools we now rely on. Chloe shared on a recent TikTok about a tip that she and a lot of people didn’t know about: Apple’s Check In feature on iMessage. You send your destination and expected arrival time to one of your contacts, and if you don’t check in by then? They will get an alert, along with your location and route history. It’s built for the unfortunate real world we live in, where peace of mind is priceless.
Meanwhile, apps like Life360 are now staples for nights out or trips abroad. They’re now on the home screens of many friend groups, offering real-time location sharing, notifications when someone leaves or arrives somewhere, and even battery life indicators.
@chloekoyce GRWM & LIL SAFETY TIP #grwm ♬ original sound – C H L O E
“Just in Case”
But it doesn’t stop there. WalkSafe+ is a personal safety app designed with real-time awareness in mind. It lets users share live locations with friends, schedule check-ins, and even see recent crime data in the area.
One of its standout features is TapSafe, where you tap your screen regularly to show you’re okay, or hold your thumb down for a silent alert if you feel unsafe. If something goes wrong, the app notifies your emergency contacts instantly with no loud alarms.
Then there’s bSafe, which includes fake calls to get you out of awkward or sketchy situations, real-time audio/video recording, and voice-activated SOS triggers. In essence, it’s turning your phone into a personal security guard, one that doesn’t sleep, doesn’t question you, and doesn’t wait to act.
Even taxi apps are starting to integrate safety features. Uber’s in-app Emergency Button and trip tracking tools allow riders to discreetly call for help or share their ride in real-time.
@desari_vix Male loneliness epidemic – you work hard for it. @C H L O E ♬ LABOUR – the cacophony – Paris Paloma
Empowered, But Tired
Yes, these tools are smart, comforting, and even empowering, and they reflect a new kind of solidarity where safety can be a click away. But at the heart of it lies the truth that’s harder to swallow: this isn’t something we should have to do or constantly think about.
Women are still expected to carry the emotional load of their own safety, constantly alert, constantly planning, constantly aware of exit routes and phone battery.
Like when Saoirse Ronan, during an episode of The Graham Norton Show, cut through a light-hearted moment with a sentence that stopped the room. Her co-guest, Paul Mescal, had mentioned how unrealistic it seemed to use your phone as a defence tool in a dangerous situation. Without hesitation, Ronan responded: “That’s what girls have to think about all the time.”
Because it’s true. For many men, safety is something to think about only if something happens. For many women, it’s the background noise of every decision, what we wear, how we get home, who we text, which app is open in our pocket just in case.
Safety for us isn’t reactive, it’s proactive, and it’s exhausting.