Joanne Larby, AKA The Make-Up Fairy, has opened up about her body insecurities, revealing her daily struggles with self-confidence.
The top blogger broke down in tears while sharing the heartfelt admission with fans, explaining that she regularly questions her body image.
“I’ve just been feeling really low, like not in my mood,” she told fans on Snapchat. “I’m so happy with my life in London. I feel completely blessed, but in myself, I’m picking out flaws constantly, and constantly wishing things were different about my body.
“I used to wake-up and think ‘Oh my skin looks really good today’ or ‘I look refreshed’ and now it’s like, ‘I look very tired, I look very old, I might need to get botox.’ I’m constantly complaining, either out loud or in my head, about how I f*cking look.
“I don’t know if the move to London has exposed me to a more aesthetically obsessed world, there’s more people with surgery here. Bearing in mind, my industry is predominantly beauty and fashion based so there’s models and fitness people that I’m around constantly.”
Joanne revealed that while it’s an ongoing battle, she feels particularly low when comparing herself to others in the gym.
“A lot of people go to the gym to be mindful and to alleviate their worries and anxieties, and I love my training, the exercise and the endorphins, but I find in my rest periods it’s causing anxiety because I’m looking around me at other people prepping and where they’re at, and me not being at that stage – and ‘Oh my god am I ever gonna be able to do this the way I need to?’
“I did say that I want to share a healthy journey with you. And by that I mean in terms of exercise and diet and not taking steroids. I want to be completely honest and transparent about the mental journey I’m going through because I’m not finding it the easiest.
“And although I want to succeed, and I want to see my body change and feel a sense of achievement, I don’t want it to consume me. And it’s quite hard when you’re doing something five to six days a week and tracking your food everyday because it becomes a job.
“And when you’re trying to work towards a goal that’s requiring so much of your time and headspace, it’s very hard not to be swayed by all the negatives that you see happen to people.
“We women have a really hard time. I’m sure some of you used to love a body part of yours, and then all of a sudden you started seeing these tiny waists and huge bums on Instagram.
“I edit myself, I love filters, I curate my content to make it look like it’s been shot professionally. But then when you see a photo of yourself without a filter and it’s not edited, you’re like ‘Oh God’.
“And when you used to think that body part was looking great, you’re looking at 10,000 people online that have extremely amazing bodies and you just can’t compare. It’s not easy.”
