Model Alison Canavan has opened up about her struggle with post-natal depression (PND) in her new book, Minding Mum.
The 37-year-old wrote candidly about her experience with ‘Baby Blues’ in the book, which she launched this week at a star-studded bash in Dublin.
Admitting she felt hopeless at the time, Alison shared a number of diary entries which documented her battle with PND.
At the beginning, signs of struggling were evident when she would write things like, “I need to rest more. I’m not superwoman”, but later on the entries got more serious, including one which read, “I feel like I’m having a nervous breakdown at the moment and my world is crumbling.”
She said she didn’t get help until much later, and shared what she wrote in her diary before reaching out to someone. “I feel like a caged animal that can’t escape,” she penned. “It’s a mixture of anger, self-hatred and frustration.
“I wouldn’t mind being in an accident and I think about wanting to die.” She added: “I have a beautiful baby boy and he needs me. How many other mothers out there are feeling like this?”
Alison said that looking back, she wishes she had known that finding her new role as a mum difficult “did not make me a bad mum, it made me a normal mum.”
“Now I can look back and see that these words were the end of a nightmare and the beginning of the rest of my life because it was just after this that I sought help. I worked hard on myself from the inside out and today I am the healthiest I have ever been.”
Minding Mum: It’s Time To Take Care Of You has been released in time for Mother’s Day. You can get your copy today for €16.99.
